Day 40: The Finish Line / by Jeff Tacklind

Wow, I can’t believe I made it all the way to 40!  When I began this Lenten journey, I had no idea just how strenuous the climb would be.  At day 20, I was creatively and emotionally exhausted.  I found myself quoting that familiar line from Arrested Development… “I’ve made a huge mistake.”

I’ve learned so much from this journey, and I’m sure I’ll be continuing to unpack it in the days to come, but one thing that is immediately clear is that my own resources were inadequate for the task.  Not that the task was really so big.  But the underlying commitment of sharing and posting daily required levels of emotional energy that I don’t possess.  I would sit at the computer and think… “I have nothing to say.”  Or I would cringe at the feelings of exposure and vulnerability and think “what have I done?”

There were a couple times when I was tempted to dust off some old material.  Stuff I hadn’t shared recently and so I probably wouldn’t get caught. But I knew that this was cheating myself and God and missing the whole point of the endeavor.  Getting to the end of my rope was the point.  And finding God there…that was the reward.

Thomas Merton writes this about Lent, “Lent has summoned us to change our hearts, to effect in ourselves the Christian metanoia (repentance).  But at the same time Lent has reminded us perhaps all too clearly of our own powerlessness to change our lives in any way.”

I definitely felt God carrying me along through the second half.  And I wouldn’t trade that for anything.  And so did all of you, honestly.  Thank you for reading along.  Thank you for your affirmations, for your exhortations, for you support and confidence building.  I needed it, more than I realized.  I finish this journey with such deep gratitude for each of you.  Thank you.

Tomorrow is Easter.  Tomorrow we celebrate freedom from the law and the enormous gift of grace.  Lent is over!  Easter is here.  And in this freedom we share in the enormous love that God lavishes on each one of us.

Thank you again for companioning me on this journey. 

Tomorrow we get to say, "He is risen!"  Or, as my Greek, Papadopulos, side of the family would say…"Christos Anesti!  Alithos Anesti!"